14 May 2011

Heartfelt

I lied, sue me.
I feel the urge to scream my heart out.

What more do i have to do now? You know what, I've never felt so important in anyone's life ever before. I've never felt so wanted by anyone ever before. But you gave me all that, in your own way. I never thought, loving you meant hurting me. The pain is slowly spreading making me feel numb now. I don’t know if my heart can’t take this kinda pain anymore. Dear heart, are you tired? Heart said, unspoken…..

This is not something I like to feel. I know, you’ll feel annoying by this thing. What choice do I have? Do you want me to scream and say towards you? Do you want me to be In a deep pain again and again? I told you before, think everything by yourself. I am not gonna tell you even a little why with me. Why my reaction is not perfectly right. It prove now, you don’t care. Its hard for me to accept reality. Perhaps am i just expecting tooo much??!! From the bottom of my heart, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I want anymore. I want you, but it hurts. Dear god, how I wish I could never involve in this thing

Dear god, take away this uncomfortable feeling. Maybe, I’m just put something on thing too much. The fault lies all on me. The price that I havta pay after a long long longgg ‘ journey ‘ I am resisting something. I should have said something earlier. I should have been honest as you say it's what you cling onto. Too bad, i couldn't do it. I am willing to face anything that comes my way no matter how much it hurts, this is just something i have to learn. Yes I HAVE TO LEARN! God’s planning something for me and I know that. Letting people in is another tough challenge for me. My biggest fear. I scared of getting hurt

I wish there was a guidebook on life
I wish I wish and I ammmm so the very wish

I’m killing my self slowly for being so quiet

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