31 May 2011

STORY #217

Lol. I am seriously swamped

Everything just rips me apart. Having somebody who hurt you so much making you cry after months of not crying. I don’t know why. I don't see the point anymore weyh. It comes a time to move one from people like that. These past few months i thought i was fine. Deep down i was just empty. EMPTY…

Past few months jelah. I’m finally at PEACE now! After months of heartaches, finally i've seen a glimpse of something good. I really hope it will last. But, rasa macam tak je. Only a few days to go to the HELL day. I am sure about that. Nevermind I’m still thankful though. No emo post. Haha :D

P/s : Anyway. I miss you. I really do. I just feel so. Not there anymore. Not to anyone. I miss you

16 May 2011

STORY #216

216 posts in this blog. Go read them and then go DAI. Hahaha :D

Alright ignore my statement up there. That’s not my main point. Right now, I wanna story about something so-called ‘ Life ‘
Well, I know everything can’t be perfect or the way I want it to be. Just as the phrase said ‘ NOTHING IS PERFECT ‘ perfection is not possible in the grand scheme of life. No matter how wonderful, happy, or peaceful your life is, it's never going to be perfect. N-E-V-E-R. Why?! I don’t needed any opinions now but I am sure we can make our life perfect! There’re hell loads of way about that. Life is the most precious assets. To be honest, my life is not sooo perfect. It struck me. Maybe things aren't the way i wanted because i expect too much while life is unexpected and full of suprises. I can honestly admit, I am too afraid of the world. I feel horribly shitty. It has taken me such a long time to finally get the idea of me being too afraid of what people think and too shy is just holding me back. I’m scared of what people gonna think about me. I never taught myself to be more open and always keep things to myself and I don’t know why

10seconds quote : Ingat 2 perkara: Ingatlah kebaikan orang kepada kita dan ingatlah kesalahan kita kepada orang. #islam

P/s : Cuti 4 hari ibarat 4 jam. Besok masuk sekolah dan exam maths. Mampus satu hapah tak baca

14 May 2011


I lied, sue me.
I feel the urge to scream my heart out.

What more do i have to do now? You know what, I've never felt so important in anyone's life ever before. I've never felt so wanted by anyone ever before. But you gave me all that, in your own way. I never thought, loving you meant hurting me. The pain is slowly spreading making me feel numb now. I don’t know if my heart can’t take this kinda pain anymore. Dear heart, are you tired? Heart said, unspoken…..

This is not something I like to feel. I know, you’ll feel annoying by this thing. What choice do I have? Do you want me to scream and say towards you? Do you want me to be In a deep pain again and again? I told you before, think everything by yourself. I am not gonna tell you even a little why with me. Why my reaction is not perfectly right. It prove now, you don’t care. Its hard for me to accept reality. Perhaps am i just expecting tooo much??!! From the bottom of my heart, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I want anymore. I want you, but it hurts. Dear god, how I wish I could never involve in this thing

Dear god, take away this uncomfortable feeling. Maybe, I’m just put something on thing too much. The fault lies all on me. The price that I havta pay after a long long longgg ‘ journey ‘ I am resisting something. I should have said something earlier. I should have been honest as you say it's what you cling onto. Too bad, i couldn't do it. I am willing to face anything that comes my way no matter how much it hurts, this is just something i have to learn. Yes I HAVE TO LEARN! God’s planning something for me and I know that. Letting people in is another tough challenge for me. My biggest fear. I scared of getting hurt

I wish there was a guidebook on life
I wish I wish and I ammmm so the very wish

I’m killing my self slowly for being so quiet

Screw exam

I could be some crazy writer one day. Right now, I’m going through my mid-terms this week and shit, unpredictable it was not easy. NOT EASY AT ALL! Especially the one and only subject I hate the most. SEJARAH! Benci tiada tahap. Fucking afraid and afraid I might be fail the exam this term. I mean no way if I have to say goodbye. I have to leave my classmate and everything. Just if I fail

By the way, this is my first post for this month. Welcome March 2011! Be good to me pls. So many things have been happening in my life since March 2011 entered my life. 1st day of Marchh hari yang paling haram. And I am sure, the month of June also gonna be a bad month. Why? Kinda personal. I just haven't found the will to write again. No stories, No joke, Those ever so personal things that come from my very soul. Nothing, whatsoever. Anyways, Thank you for following me. I'll be back whenever

P/s : Another 8 more days to go
Mood : Empty


‘ Eh boleh ke panggil stalker? Blog ni kan public. Semua orang boleh baca lah! ‘

I’m not going and I’m not going to close this blog. This is a journal, a diary of how I've changed since the first posts. Maybe, okay just maybe they’re a few people who came to this blog and read mine. I’ve been away for such a long time. I hardly think anyone is left reading my blog actually. But who knows right? If not, macam mana Ain boleh bahan aku by my post? LOL Hahahaha :D

Dear my lovely friends and readers, lemme tell you about a few things in this blog. My words are all mine. I’m typing everything by myself. But just a little things, I copied from others. Not much okay. English, I’m gonna improving my English with this writing. And only blog could help me. Cakap kat luar kang orang kata poyo, Cakap kat mak nanti mak kata GO! Hahahahah LOL! It saddens me a little okay just a little when people told me about this blog. I take it as a joke. Biasalah :)

Back to the title, wanna know why? Here’s the story


Ain : Kat blog English je

Me : Mana ada!

Ain : Eleh aku dah baca lah!

Ayu : Ha’ah aku pun penah baca lah

Me : Eish korang silap nih. Bila lak aku cakap English

Noni : Dah lah niny ngaku jelah

Me : Aku kata takde takde lah!!

Hahahahahhaha Stalkerrrsss tersayang nih :P I don’t care what do you guys gonna think or say about me. Aku nak ckap, thanks for visiting je tau! From first post, aku rasa takde yang baca pun! At least korang cakap2 tuh, sejuk sikit hati aku. Hahahahaha aindren, nonidren, ayudren <3333333333