25 November 2010

Fading away :')

Something is bothering me recently but I don’t know what. It’s killing me slowly ! Urgh I wish I could turn back the time, I wish I could go out right now. Sooooooooooo depressed I feel like crying out loud :’( i always remind myself it’s not worth to sad coz of certain people. I know and I shouldn’t be that. Yesterday was a really bad day. I spent my time just for thinking thinking thinking. While I am gaming also, my head couldn’t stop thinking of those thingy. I felt like I’m dead for hours :/ I turned off my phone for hours last night. I’m not willing to read the incoming message. When I turned it back on, I received 10 text messages. I didn’t reply all the messages. Just act like I’m sleep but actually I’m not. Hmm. I feel completely stupid, confused and alone. Sounds daft :/ Pretty much discouraged. Others time just plain stupid. I clearly remember about having a moment of clarity in which I was enjoy myself happy with my surroundings. All that has passed. I was standing in another situation right now. Much difference than before. I'm still trying to familiarize myself with this even thou it was harder. Yeah it even more than that for sure. I need someone to talk to. don't know what the hell is wrong with my head now

Dear god, please guiding me through this. Show me the better ways to get what I want and to make things clearly without hurting others, please gently open my mind and gently open my heart, please gimme a peace of mind. Amin~

Miss you~ I am sorry. Xxxooooxxx :’)

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